


What Truly Matters

by Honestmouse



Series: My Chem One Shots/ Short Works [1]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Blood, Broken Bones, Dorks in Love, Frank and Gee are long term boyfriends, Frank's Shitty immune system, Gerard Way is a protective boyfriend, Hospitals, Hypothermia, M/M, Making Out, Mental Illnesses, Mentions of Sex, No Smut, Protective Frank, Skiing, Vacations, Winter, but not suPER graphic, cursing, descriptions of broken bones, descriptions of illness, hurtFrank, hurtGerard, learning how to skii, mentions of depression, race agaisnt time, small towns in Virgina, stab wounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-07
Packaged: 2019-11-08 21:38:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17988983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Honestmouse/pseuds/Honestmouse
Summary: Gerard and Frank are impulsive. So on a whim, they decide to go on a mini vacation. They decide on a small town that has the perfect place for Frank to learn how to ski. The weather is perfect and there's nothing stopping them from an amazing weekend.Why then is Frank so nervous?Can Gerard keep Frank safe?Is there anything really that he needs to be safe from?





	1. Bliss?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This fic just kind of popped into my mind this morning. I woke up to snow on the ground and the ideas started rolling. Just wanted to mention that I do live in a very small town, no stop lights or chain restaurants in the county, so most of the things I mention about small towns in this will be based on my experiences. It will play a rather large role in the story so I wanted to clarify.  
> Hope you all enjoy!

Gerard stepped out of the car, bags of luggage in his hands proving difficult to maneuver. He heard his boyfriend laughing at him from where he was too getting out of the Uber.  
“Fuck you.” Gerard said, affectionately.   
“Let me help dumbass,” Frank said, making his way over to where Gerard, who had moved to the doorway of the rental house. He could tell that the other was sweating, even though the temperturate was sub-zero. Gerard had like seven layers of hoodies and jackets on and was for once overheated. That's what he gets for trying to be the romantic and carry all of their bags, thought Frank.  
“You got the key?”  
Gerard tried to fish through his pockets as the Uber pulled away. Frank turned to watch the car go down the icy driveway but his attention was pulled to a thump and muffled cursing coming from where his boyfriend stood.  
He was met with Gerard on his ass in the snow with the pile of luggage by the door scattered slightly from where he’d fallen onto it.   
Stifling a laugh, Frank stuck his hand out for his boyfriend to pull himself back up.  
When Gerard was back on his feet he rubbed his ass and frowned.  
“Fuckin’ bruised my ass.”  
“What you get for trying to be all chivalrous,” Frank retorted, without any real venom behind his words. Honestly he appreciated how much Gerard took care of him. The older man always made sure that Frank was spoiled. Not like in the sugar daddy way, no, Gerard spoiled him with love and stupid acts of romanticism. They were only stupid in the sense that his boyfriend was a bit clumsy and often messed up in the most adorable way, according to Frank. Gerard would always feel terrible after burning a romantic dinner or in this case falling while trying to carry all of his bags. Frank couldn’t help but fall a little more in love with the man every time. His heart swelled at the effort Gerard put into making him happy. It was like he was still trying to convince him to go on a date or go out with him, despite them having been together for years.   
Frank noticed how especially defeated Gerard looked today. He was trying to hide it but he could tell there were tears threatening to fall in his eyes as he searched for the key. Everything had gone wrong, the entirety of their way to this trip. From alarms not going off and delayed flights to shitty phone service and slippery roads, nothing seemed to have gone right. Frank knew his boyfriend was blaming himself, so he gently lifted Gerard’s chin and enveloped the other in a crushing hug.  
Gerard hugged him back with equal force, squeezing the smaller man as if he was terrified he might disappear. Soon however, Frank felt Gerard’s lips on his exposed neck, gently kissing but still sending shivers down his spine.   
“Hey, Gee. Ah-We need to go inside before we freeze to death,” he said, prying himself away and waving the key in front of his boyfriend.  
“Wait. It- how’d you get that out of my pocket?”  
Frank just grinned and unlocked the door, then he grabbed some of his bags and brought them inside.  
The second all of their things were inside, Gerard had him pinned against the door, their lips moving against each other eagerly.  
“Was this all you had planned?” Frank asked between kisses.  
Gerard didn’t answer, he simply moved to attach his mouth to Frank’s collar bone. The younger barely was able to continue his train of thought.  
“Ya know- ah- we could have stayed- mmh- home and done this?”   
He never got an answer, though he really didn’t mind. Things began going much more quickly once Gerard pulled their shirts off.   
________________________________________________  
Later the two were on the couch, wrapped in about a hundred blankets and binge watching some show on Netflix. Frank was too tired to really pay attention. He kept dozing off every once in a while, so he’d missed quite a bit. Gerard however was fully into whatever they were watching, his hand mindlessly moving from the bowl of popcorn on his lap to his mouth.   
Looking at the time on his phone, Frank realized he’d been asleep for over an hour and that it was nearly 4am.  
The light from his phone and his movement had alerted Gerard to his waking up. He smiled sleepily at Frank and moved the bowl off of his lap and motioned for the other to come closer. Frank happily snuggled up to his boyfriend, intertwining their legs and pressing his face against the other’s chest. Gerard was warm and soft and Frank was asleep again in moments.  
Gerard smiled at the adorable human asleep on him. Frank had managed to practically melt onto him and he knew they wouldn’t be able to move. So, Gerard leaned over to grab the dicared blanket from Frank’s side and draped it over them both. He turned the TV off and was quickly asleep as well.

Frank woke up some time later to the sounds of Gerard singing. Prying his eyes open, he realized that said boyfriend was not in fact still cuddled up next to him, rather it sounded like he was in the small rental house’s kitchen. Frank smiled to himself at the thought of Gerard cooking them breakfast. Maybe he was still in his pj’s, god Frank hoped he still was.   
Making his way over to the kitchen, Frank saw that Gerard was, sadly, dressed in jeans and an old band t-shirt, not his pj’s. Though, he couldn’t argue about how good the other looked. Love washed over him as he realized that his boyfriend was making his favorite breakfast, toast that had eggs cooked in the middle.  
Gerard hadn’t noticed him come in so Frank was able to watch him dance around the kitchen as he retrieved eggs from the fridge, his back to him. He was singing some old song Frank couldn’t remember the name of as he worked. Grinding again, Frank made his way over to Gerard and wrapped his arms around the other’s waist, laying his head on his neck.  
He startled for a moment but quickly realized who it was.  
“Morning baby.”  
“Mmm morning,” Frank replied, face glued to Gerard as he breathed in the other’s scent. He smelled like coffee, cigarettes, and whatever cheap soap was prestocked in the bathroom but he didn’t care.   
“Comfy there?” Gerard questioned.  
He got a muffled yes in reply, causing the older man to grin even more as he tried to finish breakfast with this small man attached to him.  
Somehow he managed and Frank let go only once Gerard said the food was ready.  
They both eagerly sat down and dug in, soon falling into easy conversation about their plans for the day.   
They had most of the morning free but since they’d slept in a considerable amount, the pair decided to leave soon so that they could get plenty of skiing in.   
When they were searching for a place for this weekend vacation, Frank had offhandedly mentioned the fact that he had never gone skiing before. Gerard, who had went on many skiing trips with his family growing up, had immediately suggested they find a cold place for him to learn. Fast forward to now, and this small town proved perfect for learning how to ski. The weather was clear but cold and there was very little wind. Gerard had done some additional research and found that this little house they were renting had a huge property attached to it. The owners boasted that it had the “perfect” area for all levels of skiers. How could he say no to that?   
The couple quickly ate their meal and Frank made his way upstairs to the bedroom to get ready. It seemed like Gerard had brought all of their things, still left in the entrance the last time he had checked, while he was sleeping. Smiling to himself and thanking his lucky stars to have such an amazing boyfriend, Frank quickly got ready.   
After he was sure that he was bundled sufficiently, he knew Gerard would fuss over him if not, Frank made his way back downstairs. His boyfriend stood in the entrance way, shrugging on an additional jacket as he grabbed their bags.   
Gerard, Frank noticed, had considerably less layers on now. He had maybe three layers, including the jacket he had just put on. When the younger questioned him offhandedly, Gerard simply said that if he’d gotten so hot the day before from simply carrying luggage, then the exercise of skiing would roast him alive if he wore any more.   
Frank agreed but couldn’t help but laugh as Gerard made sure that he was bundled up.   
“Don’t laugh at me,” he said jokingly, “ your immune system is shit and I would rather not end up with you getting sick. You were just sick the other week, so forgive me for taking extra precautions.”  
Frank didn’t have a response to that. Gerard was right, he had just gotten over a nasty case of the flu and he definitely didn’t want to do that again. Not that there was any hope that he wouldn’t get sick again, but he wanted to put it off as long as possible.   
After that, Gerard picked up his bag that held all of the necessary skiing supplies and Frank followed suit. Soon, after Gerard had went back and grabbed his phone, “Just in case, ya never know” they were off.  
Frank knew that it was less than a mile’s walk, on a well beaten trail according to the information Gerard got from the owners, to the small hill that he would learn on. As the walked, still rather warm from the heat of the house and their layers, he couldn’t help but worry. Frank was not exactly the most coordinated person on the planet, despite the shit he gave Gerard for being clumsy. There were just too many things that could go wrong, both in his control and out of it.  
Not to mention the wild animals that were probably everywhere, Frank’s brain supplied helpfully. Well his subconscious wasn’t wrong. They were in some bum-fuck town in Virginia of all places. They lived in the suburbs in Jersey, an entirely different world when compared to where they were now.   
Straining, Frank tried to hear the sounds of cars on the interstate he knew was relatively close to them. No luck, there was nothing but the sound of their footsteps in the snow and their breathing.   
In his thought, Frank had gotten a little bit behind Gerard. He could see the other man walking confidently through the snow, head moving slightly as he took in their surroundings. When he turned backwards to probably ask Frank something, the younger didn’t have time to wipe his features of whatever remnants of anxiety that were probably there. Gerard caught on in an instant. He stopped and Frank awkwardly stopped as well, still a few steps behind him.  
Gerard’s easy smile was gone now, replaced with slight concern.  
“You alright Frankie?”  
The nickname did little to ease the anxiety eating away at Frank. What made it worse was how excited Gerard had been for this trip. He knew that Gerard loved going to secluded places, away from all of the noise that other people made. When they were the only two people in the world. Or at least, when it seemed that way.  
Now, Frank had managed to ruin it by being afraid of skiing of all things. And to think, Gerard had been the one worried about ruining things.   
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Gerard asked again, now much closer to Frank.  
He didn’t answer. How was he supposed to say that he was scared over nothing? His heart was beating more rapidly now, and Frank tried to get his emotions in check. He really didn’t want to have an anxiety attack right now.  
“Frank?”  
Shit, now Gerard sounded really worried. His hand was now on Frank’s shoulder, eyes silently looking for the source of his boyfriend’s hesitation.  
“M scared,” Frank whispered. Even to his own ears it sounded stupid. What 25 year old man was afraid of skiing? The worst part was that he wasn’t sure exactly why. Generally, he enjoyed being alone with Gerard; especially when they were out on an adventure or doing something dumb. So why, now of all times was it bothering him so much.  
Much to Frank’s surprise, Gerard didn’t laugh at him or tell him how stupid he was being. Instead, he gently took the boy’s hand in his. His eyes focused onto Franks as he spoke.  
“Baby, its ok to be scared.I’m right here and I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”  
His words only helped slightly. Frank still felt the anxiety pooling in his stomach, making him feel sick.  
“Hey, we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. There is always tomorrow,” Gerard added, sensing how nervous Frank still was. He wondered briefly if the younger man had forgotten his anxiety medicine that morning. It would have been an honest mistake, one that would easily explain the seemingly random fear that was radiating off of him.  
Gerard nearly asked him, despite knowing that Frank didn’t like talking about his medication. He wasn’t really sure why Frank was so ashamed, he too took some meds for his depression,it wasn’t as if he would think of Frank any differently. But, Gerard reminded himself, it was Frank’s decision. If he didn’t want it brought up, then he wouldn’t.   
“No, we- we can keep going. I’m sorry for holding us up,” Frank said eventually.   
Not completely convinced Gerard couldn’t help but ask,  
“Are you sure Frank? I won’t be upset or anything if you don’t want to.”  
This time the younger man looked at Gerard directly, nodding his head. He seemed more sure of his answer this time.   
Gerard smiled and, with their hands still locked together, began walking again.


	2. When Snow Falls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Howdy! This chapter is going to get right into the angsty goodness that the tags promised. Fair warning: I'm gonna be really mean to Frank and Gee in this fic, BUT I promise a happy ending.  
> Hope you all enjoy!

By the time they made it to the area Gerard led them to, it was well past noon. The sun was shining in the sky, no real clouds to block its rays. Now that Frank felt slightly better, he was able to take in just how beautiful everything around him was.  
The trees, all pine, were huge. Their green needles rising up, towering above the two men, nearly touching the sky. The snow, only a couple of inches thick, was soft and made a nice crunching sound as they stepped.   
Frank noticed a couple of birds flying about as well, the occasional song being sung through the quiet that surrounded them.   
It was peaceful, he decided, being out in the middle of nowhere. No people, no cars or any other annoying human things. Frank could almost pretend that they were in the past, explorers learning about a new land.   
Gerard was humming, the same song from earlier. His soft notes blending in with the occasional bird song. Frank realized he was singing something that they had written. It didn’t have a name or anything; it was just notes and words and emotions. In another life, maybe they could have been mucisons.   
Gerard’s voice never grew old for Frank, he could never get enough of it really. He loved when they would sing in the car and the other would be so into a song that he practically performed it. Huge gestures with his hands and big smiles were accompanied by intense eye contact to either Frank or the car in front of them. Every time Gerard got lost in a song, it made Frank fall even more in love with him. As cheesy as it sounded to Frank, watching his boyfriend forget everything and just sing his favorite song was surreal. After words, and sometimes in the middle of, Frank wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of Gerard. 

Now however, Gerard was just quietly humming as he began pulling his things from the backpack. Frank took this as a cue to begin getting his things as well. Thankfully, because he hadn’t a clue of how these things were supposed to go together, Gerard helped him. He showed him how to hold the sticks as well as how he should stand so that he wouldn’t fall. Then, when he deemed Frank ready enough, he showed him how to lock his feet onto the skies and made sure he was steady.  
Quickly, Gerard got himself ready as well and pointed Frank towards the small hill to their left. The clearing they had walked into soon became larger as they made it to the edge and looked down at the slope below them.   
It really didn’t seem like a beginners’ hill to Frank, the slope was too steep and there were a few trees here and there. However, it wasn’t a long way down, he could clearly see the bottom where the ground leveled out again.   
Glancing towards his boyfriend, Frank saw that he was looking at him, concerned. His eyes seemed to ask if Frank was sure that he wanted to do this, apparently sensing the other’s hesitation. Not wanting to back down, he ignored the bad feeling in his gut and nodded to Gerard. He was ready. Well, as ready as he would probably ever be.  
“Okay, I’m gonna guide you to just slide here on flatground first. That way you’re used to it before you actually go.”  
Frank nodded, he could do that. Practice sounded nice.  
With the patience of a saint, Gerard helped Frank gently slide along the snow. He wobbled often, but the older man simply held onto his waist and mumbled quiet praises. Soon they both were grinning and laughing every time Frank nearly fell. His arms would go out, and almost like in a cartoon, he would flap them as he fell. To Gerard it was the single most adorable thing Frank could do. There was something about the pink of his cheeks from the cold and embarrassment mixed with his smile that pulled at Gerard’s chest. How on earth had he gotten so lucky?

After the better part of an hour was spent teaching Frank his balance, Gerard deemed him ready to go down the hill. Again, not wanting to upset his boyfriend, Frank nodded and went to stand by the edge. Looking down at the bottom seemed so much farther away then.   
He took a deep breath and stole another glance towards Gerard. He was smiling at Frank encouragingly. He nodded, and then Frank leaned forward.  
At first, he wasn’t going that fast. He was still going faster than he would have been walking, but Frank still felt in control. Surprisingly, he was able to keep his balance as he sped down the slope. The first tree passed by his left side, he hadn’t needed to move in order to avoid it. However the next one, still a ways down, was right in his path.   
He panicked for a moment. What had Gerard said to do so that he would move? Oh god, he couldn’t remember. He was going to hit it.  
“Just lean towards your left Frankie,” came a voice behind him. He didn’t have to turn to see who it was, knowing his boyfriend was there. Frank leaned, now vaguely remembering what Gerard had said to do earlier. He missed the tree easily.  
Gerard was beside him now, smiling brightly.  
“You’re doing so good baby!”  
Frank just nodded and went back to focusing on not falling. He had begun to gain speed meaning that keeping his balance was becoming more difficult.   
Gerard was going the same pace as him, easily keeping up. It made Frank a little disappointed in himself, he was freaking out over going fast when likely this was a snail’s pace for his boyfriend.   
He decided to pick up the pace. It was the same as sinking or swimming, if he fully immersed himself he would have to learn how. Doing his best to hold back his growing anxiety, Frank pushed of harder with the sticks, propelling himself forward.  
He vaguely heard the surprised sound that came from Gerard, making him turn his head to give a crooked grin his way. His boyfriend seemed very surprised, but there was also a proud gleam on his features. Frank couldn’t look for long without risking losing his balance so he quickly refocused his attention.  
It was way harder now that he was going so fast. The end of the slope was coming up faster now, and Gerard was well behind Frank. Oh shit, he had never learned how to stop.   
Should he just slam his sticks into the ground like anchors? Turn his skis outward?  
He had no clue.   
Seeing the bottom very close now, Frank turned to ask Gerard. He was so far away that the younger had to practically yell to be heard.  
His heart sunk when he realized that it didn’t seem like Gerard had heard him.   
Gerard just looked confused as Frank continued to strain to look at him.   
Suddenly panic spread across Gerard’s face, now leaving Frank confused.  
He watched Gerard point directly ahead, mouthing his name. Frank was still speeding and Gerard was really far away now.   
It took a moment for Frank to see what his boyfriend was pointing at once he figured out that he was supposed to look in front of him.  
Though when he saw what lay ahead, his blood ran cold.  
Frank was only a few feet away from it, and getting closer by the second.  
He didn’t have time to think, no time to react, before he was flying off the hidden cliff edge.   
He fell for what felt like forever, suspended in the air with the world spinning around him. Somehow he’d ended up upside down, as the ground approached fast, Frank knew enough to not land on his head. He also knew to throw his sticks, not wanting to land on them.  
Frank didn’t even notice hitting the ground, the soft snow probably feeling like concrete. He didn’t hear the snap of his leg, nor the sound of his boyfriend calling his name frantically from the edge.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________

Gerard watched in horror as Frank flew off the cliff then hit the ground,inaudible. He didn’t move, he didn’t get up. Oh god.  
He was dead.  
Moving fast, trying to figure out what to do, Gerard remembered his phone in his pocket. Trying to pull his gloves off, he reached into his pants pocket and grabbed the device. Fumbling to turn it on, he looked back down at his deathly still boyfriend. He nearly dropped the phone when he saw red begin to pool around Frank. Looking frantically, he noticed how this right leg was bent in an odd angle and that the blood seemed to come from there.  
“Oh, fuck,” he whispered, terrified.  
His phone was taking a lifetime to turn back on, the cold probably draining its battery.  
Gerard didn’t notice he was falling until it was too late, too preoccupied with getting his phone working.   
The cliff he was standing on, the snow probably weakened by the two skiers, gave way underneath Gerard. Suddenly he was rolling down the hill side, pain sparking up everywhere.   
It seemed like he rolled forever.  
It seemed like he hit every tree and stump on the way down.  
Finally, Gerard felt himself roll to a stop.   
All he could do was look at the sky. Realizing that every part of his body but his head was under the snow, Gerard panicked. He struggled for a while, trying to get out of the heavy powder. Soon the snow that he shoveled became stained red. He wondered if he had landed on top of Frank, suffocating him under the snow.  
This made Gerard dig faster, despite how cold he was becoming, harsh shaking encompassing his body.  
Once he made it to the snow surrounding his middle, the realization hit him. It wasn’t Frank’s blood, it was his.  
He could see his own ski stick embedded in his stomach. Gerard couldn’t feel it though, the cold and adrenaline working to keep him alive.   
He continued working until, finally, his body was free of the snow.  
Gerard lay on the ground for a few moments, breathing heavily with his hand on the stick poking out of him.   
It needed out, he needed to take it out before it caused more damage. Gerard reasoned that since he was still conscious and able to dig himself out, that there was probably no real damage. That meant he should take the stick out.  
Steadying himself, Gerard looked up at the clouds above him. He noticed how fast they were moving, how scarce they seemed to be.   
He pulled hard at the stick inside him, yanking it free in one go.  
Gerard was unable to stop the scream that erupted from him.   
It hurt now, where it had once been numb, a burning pain covered his entire abdomen, taking his breath away.  
He breathed to himself for a few moments, willing his heart to slow back down where it was frantically beating in his chest.  
He placed his hand over the wound, surprised to see just how much blood was pouring out of him.  
“Fuck,” he whispered, realizing now that he probably shouldn’t have removed the stick.  
Turning his attention back up to the clouds, Gerard couldn’t help the tears that fell.   
Frank was hurt and he had no idea where the younger was. He needed to get to him, needed to make sure that he was okay.   
Black spots were dancing in his vision now, making him blink rapidly in an attempt to make them go away.  
He needed to find Frank.  
Gripping his stomach, Gerard slowly brought himself to his feet.   
He nearly fell, his legs almost refusing to hold him, but forced himself to stay upright.  
Frank needed him.  
He took one step, the pain in his stomach grew and a whimper escaped his lips. Gerard looked down and saw blood dripping down into the snow.   
His legs gave out, and he fell without a sound.  
Gerard was honestly surprised he was still conscious, but he couldn’t focus on that. He needed to find Frank. If he died while he was just laying in the snow Gerard would never be able to forgive himself.  
Struggling now to even move his arms, Gerard pulled himself along. Using his arms to half- crawl through the snow on his stomach.   
He didn’t look behind him, afraid of scaring himself by how much blood he was losing. He felt like an idiot, he’d pulled out the stupid stick and now he was going to bleed out before he saved Frank.   
Gerard kept going though, determined to get to Frank. Each inch felt like a mile to him, no other thoughts in his head other than his boyfriend. He couldn’t feel the pain any more, neither could he feel the cold. Gerard found it harder and harder to pull his body each time and soon he was laying still in the snow. His head simply resting on the soft snow, too weak to even lift it. His vision was failing again, making Gerard feel dizzy, so he closed his eyes.   
He was unconscious in seconds.


	3. So you think you could survive?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! This chapter is a little shorter than the rest because it's 6am and I have a 12 hour shift at work starting at 9. That being said, I didn't want to miss updating today so here is something at least.   
> Side Note: the chapter title is the name ( or at least close to the name) of one of those survival shows you see on tv. They play a kinda(?) big part so just wanted to mention it.  
> Thanks for reading!

By the time Frank managed to fumble his way back into consciousness, the sky had already decided to paint in fire. Bright oranges and pinks filled his view, clouds looking like brushstrokes. Frank could just barely see the actual sun from where it was setting over a nearby mountain.   
It was beautiful, he thought. Vaguely he wondered if Gerard would want to paint it. Frank knew that he was talented enough to capture the colors and light, but there was something nagging at the back of his mind.  
Blinking slowly, Frank realized just how cold he was. He was shivering, which begged the question of why was he so damn cold?.   
He’d been out skiing with Gerard a moment ago, had he fallen and hit his head? Was that why he couldn’t remember?  
Frank wasn’t sure, but he decided to get up and take a look around. Maybe they had fallen asleep together and his boyfriend was just going to the bathroom.  
He didn’t get to stand, no the pain in his leg pretty much prevented that.  
Looking down worriedly, Frank nearly threw up.   
Yeah, his leg was not supposed to bend that way, and he was pretty sure that bones were not on the outside.  
Well fuck, he thought to himself.  
There was blood mixed in with the snow all around him, but as far as he could tell, he’d stopped bleeding on his own.  
That was the other concerning bit.   
Where was Gerard?  
It was obvious that no one had found him yet, which was odd because he remembered Gerard being right there with him when…  
Well of course his dumb ass had fallen off a cliff. No wonder Gerard spoiled him so much, there was the possibility of him tripping over their dog’s tail and dying, he was so clumsy.  
Frank cautiously pushed himself up into a sitting position, worried that he couldn’t feel the pain in his leg. Well, that wasn’t the right word. He could feel it, but for whatever reason he wasn’t able to feel it as much as one would think. It ached, but the amount of pain associated with badly broken bones was not there.  
(( kinda graphic here, sorry!))  
His thigh literally had a bone sticking out of the side, and the amount of blood around him attested to how much he’d bled while unconcious. So why then could he not feel it?  
Taking a closer look, Frank saw that what was left of his right pants leg was stiff and frozen. There was even bits of ice sticking off of the shredded fabric around the bone.   
(( Ok you’re safe))  
The blood had frozen, well that can’t be good, Frank thought.  
Maybe that was why he couldn’t feel it. It was so cold out that it was freezing his nerves, like an all natural Icy Hot but the side effects were the possibility of losing limbs.  
Frank wondered how cold it actually was, and more importantly where was his boyfriend. He prayed that nothing had happened to him, the thought of losing Gerard sending sparks of anxiety through him.  
The only was he was going to find out what happened, would be to go and find him. Frank, knew though that with his leg the way it was, he would not be able to walk anywhere. That and the fact that he felt very dizzy from just pushing himself up onto his elbows told of how bad a shape he was in.  
Frank’s mind began to supply helpful thoughts again. Things like:  
“How cold will it get once the sun goes down?” and “ Do you think there’s any bears or wolves around here?”   
He couldn’t help how much these thoughts got ot him, though he specifically pushed the ones about Gerard being hurt or worse from his mind.   
Absentmindedly he realized how fast his heart was beating, how fast his breathing had become and he tried to regain control. There’d be no use having a panic attack out here, he thought, knowing that he needed to do something.  
Leaning back onto the cold snow, Frank brought his hand up to his chest and snaked it under his jackets to feel his heartbeat. Using this, he managed to regain control, at least somewhat.  
Trying to think, Frank knew that he had watched one of those “How to Survive” shows on some weather channel and he racked his brain for an episode on lost in the middle of snowy nowhere.  
Vaguely he remembered that overall, it was best not to move unless you were in present danger.  
He looked around, just trees and snow, no animals. That meant he was relatively safe, though he needed to get warm. The seven- literally seven, Gerard had made sure of it- layers of jackets and sweaters were still relatively warm, but he wasn’t sure how long that would last.  
Taking a deep breath, Frank pushed himself back up onto his elbows, looking around for shelter.  
There were some sticks and broken tree branches, that had probably fallen when it snowed, a good bit away. Though, he doubted he’d be able to go over there and carry them back. Let alone put them together for shelter.  
Something else he learned from those stupid TV shows, assuming they actually could be trusted, was that you could dig into the snow and make a burro of sorts to stay warm. Seeing as the snow was only a few inches deep at the most, Frank decided to hone his inner child and do a makeshift igluu.   
Hopefully the ground would be warm and the walls of ice would protect him from the wind. That was good and all, but he needed to actually do it now.   
It took forever, but at the same time it was all a blur. Once he started working, every shift sent new sparks and burning waves of pain through his leg and hip. He kept working, afraid that if he stopped he would never finish.  
It was just after dusk when Frank finished, walls of snow pushed up all around him. When he sat up fully he was able to look over them, but when he laid down he was protected. He’d made enough room for his right leg to stay stretched out in front of him, too afraid to move it.  
Frank wished he’d grabbed his phone too, it made no use Gerard having one if he didn’t. Then again, his boyfriend probably didn’t expect for them to be seperated and Frank breaking his leg. 

It was getting difficult to see then, the sun fully gone and the moon rising in the east. Frank was exhausted, all he wanted to do was sleep and despite the danger he was probably in, he closed his eyes and was asleep in seconds.


	4. How Much You Mean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! This going to be the second to last chapter in this fic so things move kinda fast here. Also a bit more blood and stuff than I originally intended in this part so just a heads up on that.   
> I just wanted to say that I am not a doctor or nurse so the only knowledge I have on extreme cold and blood loss and what it does to the body is from the hour or so of research I did before writing this fic. So if I got anything incorrect, please feel free to tell me and I will try and fix it. I want this to be as close to real life as possible.  
> Enjoy!

The next morning, Frank woke up early. The sun was just lighting up the sky with the first rays of the day, gracefully heating up the air just a fraction. It was still too cold in Frank’s opinion, but the sun was a blessing. He’d slept the entire night, he realized, without any local life finding him. Though, that also meant that Gerard hadn’t either, which sent pangs of anxiety through him.  
Pushing himself up on to his elbows, Frank took in the state of his leg. It still looked like shit if he was honest and he definitely would not be walking around anytime soon, but he’d live.  
That was IF he managed to get out of the woods and get somewhere warm before he froze to death.   
Again Frank wondered where Gerard was.  
He took in his surroundings. Just a bunch of trees and snow. Oh, and the stupid cliff he fell from.   
Wait?  
Had it always looked like that?   
Frank could have sworn that there had been more snow on top when he slid off of it. Now that he was paying attention, the base of the cliff could be seen from between the trees in front of him. It had a shit ton of snow piled there, looking fresh but uneven. It was as if it all had fallen at once in a big clump.  
“Mother fuck,” the pieces clicked together for Frank.  
Pushing himself up all the way, he tried to see the rest of the displaced snow through the trees. Gerard had probably been on top of the cliff when it slid, and Frank knew that if he had been buried under all the snow that he was probably-. No he was not going to even consider that.  
He looked desperately, trying to find some sign of life among the soft peaks of snow littered everywhere. There was one bigger pile right about the middle so Frank got closer.  
He grit his teeth and pushed himself up, holding all of his weight on his unbroken leg. Still the pain made Frank see stars and he had to take a moment to breathe before he could continue.   
Seeing no other way, Frank hopped on one leg, using the trees around him as support. He slowly, painfully made his way closer to the piles of snow. Now that he was near, he could see something black laying on top of the biggest pile. It looks like one of those ski sticks that he and Gerard were using, but he doesn’t have time to think on that.   
There red, everywhere. Frank isn’t sure how he missed it, it’s staining the entire top of the pile and even splattered some just to the side.   
Frank fights the sick feeling in his stomach and pushes forward until there are no more trees to lean against. Despite the cold there is sweat beading on his face and the back of his neck from the exertion. Ignoring this, he pushes off the last tree and hops to the base of the large pile.   
Knowing he’s going to have to climb it, but fearing the pain it’s going to bring, Frank pauses. His heart is beating rapidly now, and the growl of his stomach surprises him. It’s only been about a day since he’d eaten, but the blood he lost probably took its toll on him, he reasoned.   
The next sound surprised him even more: coughing. Wet, miserable coughing coming from the other side of the pile.  
He was going to have to climb it. 

 

He’s on the other side now, with no memory of how he got there, but the pain in his leg provides enough telling.   
The sight he’s met with finally releases whatever self control he has on his stomach.  
Frank hits the ground, emptying his( already empty) stomach in violent heaves.  
Once he’s done, he tries to stand again but finds his good leg cannot support him.   
He can barely get it to move, as if the signal from his head to the leg is only half working.   
He doesn’t dwell on it though; he’s close enough so that he doesn’t have to move.   
Gerard is right there beside him, on his stomach facing the opposite direction. There’s blood everywhere, in a long line from the top of the pile of snow down to where the man lay.  
Frank is too afraid to see if he’s alive. There’s so much blood.  
Then he remembers the coughing, Gerard had been alive at least a little while ago and he needed to make sure he still was.  
Frank pushed himself back up slowly, into a sitting position. His right leg was stretched out in front of him, but it brought no relief. Burning pain still encompased his entire leg and it was bleeding again, a sluggish stream of red falling into the snow.  
Still, he leaned over and check his boyfriend’s pulse. Gerard’s face was turned out, his arms stretched out in front of him like he had been trying to grab something. Frank desperately wished Gerard’s eyes would open, that he would jump up and pull out a gallon or two of fake blood and laugh about it.  
He waited, no steady beat under his fingers, only cold clammy skin. He shifted his hand, desperate for a pulse, anything to prove that Gerard was still alive.   
He ignored the blood, surround him in a sick sort of halo around his entire body. He ignored the little splatters around Gerard’s mouth too.  
Frank was terrified, hands shaking from more than the cold as he positioned his hands again.  
He felt it then, the signs of life, the weak and erratic beating of Gerard’s heart. It was struggling and he was too cold, but god damn it he was alive.  
Tears began to fall, hot streaks down Frank’s face.   
Gerard coughed again, much weaker than before even though more blood found its way into the snow.  
Frank needed to get him off of the snow, the cold was absolutely not helping his boyfriend’s condition.  
Gently, Frank rolled him over. He winced when the man whimpered patherticly, not even opening his eyes as he was pulled up onto Frank’s lap.   
He could see now what had happened.  
The fabric around Gerard’s middle was ripped and soaked in half frozen blood. Something, probably the ski stick, had gone through him. Thankfully, could he really be thankful?, it hadn’t gone all the way through.   
But that was the extent of the good news.   
Frank was starving now, and when he tried to reposition his leg he nearly passed out from the pain. It was getting worse the longer he left it untreated.  
Gerard, god Frank didn’t even want to think about how bad he was, still hadn’t moved. Still hasn't shown any signs of consciousness.  
Frank leaned down, pressing his boyfriend’s head against his chest. He wished Gerard would just wake up.   
He needed to hear his voice, to see his eyes open a looking around.   
God, he missed him.  
“Please, please. Gee, I need you,” he whispered to the unconscious man in his arms.  
He moved, startling him as the man in his lap shifted slightly but stopped abruptly.   
Frank had to lift his head to see Gerard but was astounded to see those hazel eyes blinking back at him, unfocused.  
“Gee?” he whispered.  
He didn’t answer, but still Gerard’s eyes were open and he was staring at Frank like he was seeing Jesus or something.  
“F- Fr-”  
“Shh. No baby, don’t try and talk. Take it easy, please,” Frank pleaded, worried his boyfriend would close his eyes again. He didn’t know if he’d be able to take it if Gerard was not with him again.   
Frank ran his fingers through Gerard’s hair, just enjoying the softness of the brown locks and the small smile that it brought to his boyfriend’s pale face.  
Gerard frowned, eyes blinking slowly as if they were threatening to fall shut.  
“Phone,” he whispered, barely lifting his hand to point at his pocket.  
Frank followed with his eyes, and upon seeing the cellphone sticking out of the pocket he nearly cried with joy.  
Quickly Frank grabbed the phone, though when he resituated himself Gerard’s eyes were closed once again.  
“Gee?”  
No answer, no eyes fluttering, nothing.  
Harsh, rasping coughs overtook the man in his arms. Gerard’s body shook with each one as his body tried to get rid of the gunk in his lungs. Frank actively chose to ignore that it was probably his own blood causing the issue.  
Thankfully, the fit ended quickly.   
Frank used his shirt sleeve to wipe the blood that had gotten on Gerard’s check during it. His stomach protested again, this time he wasn’t sure if it was from hunger or the sickening sight before him.  
Remembering the phone, Frank miraculously found that it was turned on and with over half battery.  
Even better, there was signal.   
Not wanting to question their sudden good fortune, Frank quickly dialed 911.  
His fingers didn’t seem to work right though and he had to keep backspacing and trying again. Thank god the number was short.  
While it rang, he took off one of his jackets and draped it over Gerard’s body in an attempt to warm him back up.   
“Hello 911, what’s your emergency?” the female voice on the other end asked politely.  
“Me and my boyfriend are lost in the woods.”  
“Oh no, ok what’s your name and do you know any general area you are in?”  
“Uh, Frank and my boyfriend’s name is Geard. We’re in Virginia, and,”  
He quickly answered all of the lady’s questions.  
The worst was when she asked about his and Gerard’s condition.  
Saying out loud that his boyfriend was freezing and pale with a puncture wound in his stomach made everything even worse.   
After what felt like forever, the lady said that she was able to track their call and that help was on its way.  
“Ya hear that Gee? We’re gonna be alright.”


	5. You Must Be Stronger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one's a little late, had a really long day and only just got the chance to write. It's kinda late where I am so if there are any mistakes in this chapter I apologize, also I rewrote this one like four times. I just couldn't figure out how I wanted it to end exactly, but I am mostly happy with this version so..  
> Thanks for reading, Enjoy!

The next few hours were a blur for Frank. He mindlessly answered the 911 lady’s questions, though he did learn her name was Margret. He kept checking on Gerard, wishing that he would open his eyes again or show any signs that he was still alive. The only thing Frank had to go on was the ever slower beating of Gerard’s heart under his fingertips.  
Margaret had told him to keep watch on his boyfriend’s condition and she would periodically ask for updates.   
Frank assumed it was also to keep his anxiety in check, by keeping his mind and body busy.  
“How many beats Frank?”  
He rattled off the number, not stopping to think. He kept counting each one under his fingers.  
Frank wondered how bad Gerard really was. He was no doctor, but he knew that a sluggish pulse was not a good sign.   
“Frank?” she said through the phone, probably able to hear his breathing getting faster.  
“I’m still here,”  
“It’s going to be okay, just keep counting for me. The crews are about half an hour away now, you two are almost done,” Margaret said, kindly. Frank could tell how worried she was, her division probably didn’t get a lot of calls like this. Gerard and him were probably the first if he was honest.  
Frank was shaking harshly by the time the first rescue personnel walked through the trees to their left. The cold had now taken its claim over him, his jackets no longer doing any good. He’d stopped shaking, stopped being able to answer the 911 worker who was still talking to him gently through the phone.  
He simply sat there, with Gerard in his arms as the crew gathered around them. They all spoke quickly, but quietly, as they tried to asses the two’s condition. Frank couldn’t answer them, his mouth no longer forming the right words.   
Everything was spinning in his vision, the trees and people blurring together into an incoherent blob of color. It made Frank want to throw up, his heart beating rapidly inside his chest.  
“Hey, Frank,” one of the nearest men said, squatting down to eye level, “you’re okay now. You’re safe, but you have to let us look at him. It’ll be a lot harder to help if you don’t okay?”  
The guy seemed nice, his kind smile aiming at Frank and making him release the death grip he didn’t know he had on Gerard.  
“Thank you Frank. Don’t worry, we’re going to take care of both of you.”  
Frank just nodded numbly, he wondered how he was still upright. All of his muscles felt frozen and he could barely move his head.   
Arms wrapped around his middle, startling him a little.  
He must have jumped because a quiet voice behind him whispered an apology.  
Frank craned his neck back, trying to get a good look at whoever was holding him.  
An older woman with long white hair was smiling down at him, she was the one holding him up.  
“Gee?” he whispers, too tired to say any more. He hopes they know what he means.  
“He’s being put on the stretcher right now, you’re gonna go on the next one and you both will ride in the ambulance,” she explained.  
“Together?”  
“Yes, honey. We wouldn’t dream of separating you two.”  
Frank smiled, feeling hopeful for the first time in what felt like forever. 

 

________________________________________________________________________

The first day in the hospital was the worst for Frank.   
He couldn’t help be bitter over the fact that he and Gee were not in fact together, and he hadn’t seen him since the forest.  
The rational side of him knew that Gerard was in surgery and that he would be for most of the day before they moved him back into Frank’s room.   
That didn’t help him though, he was tired and sore and he desperately wanted his boyfriend. Frank needed to have his calming presence, he missed it like nothing he’d ever known.   
He needed to know that Gerard was safe, the image of his body laying so broken in the snow prompt in his mind.   
The fear that Gerard wouldn’t come back from the surgery made it even worse. The doctors had kindly told him that there was a chance, a pretty good one, that he would not make it. They were quick to tell Frank that miracles and seemingly impossible things happened all the time, that did nothing to help.  
It was dark now, Frank had been staring through the window by his bed since he’d woken up. He’d slept away the rest of the first day, then woken up around mid morning the next day. His leg was in a massive cast, but he couldn’t feel it. They’d given him some pretty good pain meds to keep him comfortable.   
He’d asked the doctor around lunch time if his leg was going to be ok. The young man, he looked about Frank’s age, said that he would have to go to physical therapy to help get his motor function back with his right leg. Then he was quick to assure Frank that he was lucky, there had been minimal damage all things considered.  
Frank didn’t feel lucky.  
“But,” the doctor had continued, “ you do have a mild case of hypothermia from your exposure to the cold for so long. That is likely why you feel so poorly at the moment, but it is a rather simple thing to treat. We’ve got you on fluids and in a warm environment, so now all you need to do is rest. As long as you take it easy, you’ll be feeling better in no time.”  
Frank couldn’t deny that he did feel like shit, so he took the man’s advice and let himself fall into a fitful sleep.   
He dreamed of snow and blood. Of Gerard’s limp, cold body against his own. Images flashed, too fast for him to make sense of.   
When at last he woke up, it was not to an empty room. Instead, there were four or five nurses or doctors all gathered around the bed that was to become Gerards.  
He could hear them talking, not really quiet but still voices lowered. Their words made no sense to Frank, all of it medical jargon that flew in one ear and out the other. Though when they mentioned something about how well the surgery went, and how they were able to stop all internal bleeding, Frank nearly jumped out of his bed.  
The cast and IV prevented this of course, but he sat upright so quickly that his head swam.  
He desperately tried to see Gerard through the circle of doctors surrounding him. He needed to know if he was okay.  
“Gerard? Is he-?” Frank’s arms were shaking as they tried to hold his weight up but he didn’t care.  
One doctor, the closest to him, turned first and smiled. All of the others turned too, their faces unreadable.   
They moved out of the way, leaving a gap at the head of the hospital bed that Frank could see through.   
Gerard lay there, pale and unmoving. There was a tube in his mouth and wires all over him, but he was there.   
He looked so damn small among all of the blankets and bandages and machines. Just his head and arms could be seen and his skin was almost as pale as the sheets he was surrounded by.  
Gerard’s usual smile was nothing but a memory to Frank, and he yearned to see the life back in his boyfriend’s face.   
Frank couldn’t hold back the tears now, he could see the rise and fall of his blanketed chest.   
Suddenly though, he couldn’t breathe as the tears that fell were replaced with sobs. All of the fear, the worry that he’d felt during this whole thing coming to a head. It’d been a while since Frank had had a full blown attack like this.  
He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. All he could see was the very still body of his boyfriend on the bed across from him.   
The doctors tried to comfort him but he barely noticed.   
Suddenly, there was someone hugging him. Cushioning him against their chest and whispering something into his ear.   
They seemed familiar, but Frank’s panicking brain provided no helpful guesses.  
“Shh, Frank it’s okay. He’s okay now,” the voice accompanying the arms said.  
“Mikey?”   
He heard a light chuckle that sounded too broken to be a laugh.  
“Yeah, it’s me. Just breathe, he’d kill me if I don’t take care of you while he can’t,” Mikey said quietly.  
Frank didn’t answer, too exhausted to form coherent thoughts.   
Though he did wonder when Gerard’s brother had gotten there. Had he been there the whole time?  
“He’s not awake,” Frank whispered, still savoring Mikey’s warm embrace. He hadn’t seen him in almost a year, jobs and life getting in the way. He knew that Gerard always kept in touch with his brother, but he hadn’t been able to. Mikey had been one of his closest friends for a long time, he had been the one to introduce him to Gerard.   
Mikey had dealt with Frank’s anxiety since they were in middle school, so he knew what to do to help the other man calm down.  
Frank was thankful for the familiarity of he and Mikey working through an attack like this. If Gerard couldn’t be there for him, which still sent a sharp pang of anxiety through Frank, then he was glad that it was Mikey.  
After only a few more minutes, his breathing had calmed and he was laying nearly limp against the younger Way brother. Neither said a word, both he and Mikey too tired for anything else.   
The doctors all left after a while, and Frank was able to take in more of Gerard’s look. He was so still, it felt wrong to see him like that.  
“He’s gonna be okay Frankie,” Mikey said, seemingly reading his thoughts.  
“But he’s not right now.”  
“He will be. I talked to the doctor. He said that since the surgery went well that Gee should be awake within a day or two.”  
“God, I don’t think I can wait,” Frank admitted.  
Mikey chuckled, and he could feel him take a deep breath. He was never good with saying his emotions out loud, even to Frank or Gerard.   
“You waited on him once, you can do it again. This time it’ll be much sooner.”  
Frank hardly didn’t see the resemblance between waiting on Gerard to come home from college and waiting on him to wake up after nearly dying.  
He had been able to text Gee while he was away at college, now all he was able to do was stare at his unconscious body.   
He and Mikey sat there for the rest of the evening, just sitting together in the bed and talking. They really didn’t talk about anything in particular, just random memories and things that they wished were different. Frank could almost pretend that Gerard was hurt so badly.   
_______________________________________________________________  
It was two days later that Gerard first showed the signs of waking up. Frank had been given permission to sit up, but was still not allowed to try and walk or stand. He was beginning to get frustrated by this; he wanted to be able to walk over to Gerard’s bed.   
Frank wished he could curl up in the other bed, wished he could wrap his arms around the older man.   
They had been sitting there, doing nothing really, when Gerard squeezed his brother’s hand. Altering the other two in the room to his now conscious state seemed to be the extent of his current capabilities though. He simply looked back and forth slowly between his brother and Frank, eyes asking a million questions as he did so.   
“Gee?” Mikey spoke quietly, conscious of his brother’s condition.  
“Mhh?”   
“How’re you feeling?”   
The “are you kidding??” look that MIkey got in return was enough to break through some of the concern lingering on both of their chests.  
If Gerard was still sarcastic, he was going to be fine.  
His eyes suddenly met Frank’s again.  
Gerard still looked confused, and he watched as he struggled to find his voice. Fresh worry came when the pale man failed several times at speaking his name. Each time made the weight a little heavier again.   
“Fr-Frank?”  
Frank was crying now, and wishing even more that he didn’t have the stupid cast on his leg so that he could embrace Gerard.  
“Hey Gee,” he whispered.  
Suddenly, Mikey let go of his brother’s hand and stood up. Both men looked up at him confused.   
He walked over to where Frank’s bed was and casually picked him up, and sat him down in the space on Gerard’s bed that was now free.   
Frank instantly lay down beside him on top of the blankets, conscious of the bandages still around the other man’s waist.   
Gerard had a slightly dopy grin as he moved a little in order to snuggle closer to him.   
“Frank… I- you,” he stuttered out.  
Thankfully, Frank recognized the concern laced in those scattered syllables.  
“I’m fine, I promise. My leg’s a little broken but other than that-”  
He wasn’t sure why he didn’t mention the slight hypothermia as he trailed off, maybe it was so that he could get rid of the worried look on Gerard’s face. He hated it; he was not the one who should be worried over. No, Gerard took that title.   
The doctors had told Frank the full extent of his boyfriend’s injuries, broken ribs from the fall, blood loss and internal bleeding, and fucking hypothermia. He was extremely lucky to be alive and Frank was not about to let him spend this time worrying over him.  
Thankfully, his words seemed to satisfy Gerard.   
He leaned in closer to Frank as Mikey maneuvered the IV over closer to them. He flashed the two one last smile and left without a word.   
The doctors would probably be upset with them for moving around so much. Probably even more so that Gerard had moved so that he could hold Frank’s hand better.   
Frank couldn’t bring himself to care in the slightest because he was awake and squeezing his hand like he was terrified he wouldn’t be there anymore, and he would rather die than leave Gerard alone again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, if you have any comments or anything please do not be afraid to leave a little comment here! I love reading abut how you guys feel about these fics. I will post a new chapter every day and if I'm not done by the time my spring break is done next week, my updates might be a little sporadic.   
> Thanks again and see you tomorrow!


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